Don't crack your knuckles

There are many things I shouldn't do, but I still do them out of habit or want overriding need and survival. All the time I'll say "I'm never eating that again" or "I'm gonna start working out soon!". Then I turn around and eat a jar of nutella and I can't stop craving a pizza hut pizone to save my life. Well, things have to change...probably the fifth time I've said that here on this blog, but now it seems pretty serious. 

You know how they always say that its never lupus on that show House? Well this time it might be lupus, which at first was really funny but now its kinda scary. Got a call from my doctor today about the results of some blood work I got done. Seems I'm anemic and pointers are showing possibility for lupus but she wants more test done. I'm trying not to worry about it...at least its not cancer, like my sad cat. Oh yeah, Miko might have cancer, so that's fun. 

Is it wrong to want God to move me around like a puppet? Just to want to keep it simple and not want to be involved in the plan that he has for me? 

 Apparently, I don't process information very well...I guess that could be true. I tend to laugh about an issue for a while before taking it seriously. I'm kinda scared now... this is a bit serious, linked to my diet as well. Might have to give up on meat, that is truly scary.

I guess...it'll all work out. Just going to have to change my habits up a bit and be more serious about things. Maybe it will turn out that I don't have lupus and that the doctor read the test wrong. Maybe I'm just plagued with bad joints. It could be anything....right?

Song: World at large by Modest Mouse

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E68DYqo2m2M