Blood and Mistletoe

Being here in England I've learned a few things about myself. 

I've learned that I really like the Druids and would love to learn more about them. The trip to Stonehenge was magical and I can't wait to read more about it and the history of the Druids that worshiped there.

I've learned that I'm bad with money, especially when I'm lacking in direction or bills. I spend and spend and get excited and spend some more till there is -5.13 in my bank account and a stack of pennys in my wallet. Then I have the audacity to worry and fret about money when I have no more. Maybe a budgeting class or self control class is in order. 

INFP really describes me. Understanding that has taught me methods on how to interact with children who would usually cause me mental pain to not snap at. I love people and now I think I've figured out how to include children in that mix. Trying to understand where they are coming from instead of snapping at them or getting mad at them has been a game changer for me. I hope this method works still when I get home.

Learning to trust God has been a big part of being here and spending time with him and putting my future in his hands has been such a big relief. My plans have always failed me but when I know God is behind an action I know which way to go. 

I really suck at giving gifts. Especially ones that I don't make. It weighs on my heart the idea that the gift I get the person won't be enough or that they really won't like it and then they will just give me that fake smile. I've got a shelf above me covered in gifts for people at home. I just hope they like them. 

Not a fan of beans with breakfast. Just...not that into it. I know its a common British thing but I'm really not too cool with it. I'll take my iHOP french toast thank you very much. 

A lot has to change for me when I get home. I need to work out more, eat healthier, find more work, do more crafts. No more lazy days. Being here has taught me that I need to be more active, less governed by my emotions, which is difficult being INFP...

Newbold College. I want to finish my bachelors degree. I already have my associates and I really want to finish and open more opportunities for myself. This means money and money and more money. I'm praying about this, would appreciate prayers.

England has been an amazing experience. I have little over a week left here. Everything has been wonderful and I've learned so much, all this and more. I've gained so much intellectually and physically I've put on a few. I would definantly visit England again, next stop: Everywhere else. 

Read A Book

The Tower of London, that wonderful place of history. It makes me want to read history books which aren't really my thing. Unless its like A Song of Ice and Fire, then history gets pretty interesting. Thinking back on what the tour guide was saying about the history of the Tower of London, its not too different from A Song of Ice and Fire. Murder, incest, cheating, treason, etc.; It's all very interesting. Then there is the crown jewels, I wanted them all. Sadly I couldn't have any nor take pictures of them. 

Right, so I'll start from the beginning. After many days of awesomeness and a fun trip to the mall of wonder(which ended in me acquiring a beautiful jean jacket), we traveled into the land of central London. Just Jodi and I spent the night in a wonderful hotel and traveled to the land of Oxford street, Soho, and Covet street. So I figured out that I shop too much when I have money and clothes around me that fit. 

Five pairs of leggings, three shirts, a cardigan, and two skirts later I found the wonder of souvenirs. When I found the souvenirs, I purchased them. When I purchased them I felt like a proper tourist. It twas awesome. 

So we walked about all over the place. Buckingham Palace, Green park, the queen's garden(where she owns all the swans and has vaccinated them accordingly cause she doesn't like them dying), Horse parade, Tower of London, this very amusing bar called 'The Horniman at Hay's', and of course the underground(which I've become heavily fond of). 

Hilarity ensued when I went to feed a squirrel. It was in the queen's garden. The squirrels were walking about and getting food from everyone. Jodi encouraged me to feed the little beast. So I crouched down and tried to hand the little monster some bread. The first tiny rodent was not interested, then there was the second fiend who was very receptive of yum yums. So much so that the brute touched my hand and then gleefully ate what was a yummy pastry. 

There were some very bold swans and some photobombing tourist and a bunch of very strange floating street performers(including death, a floating death). I love everything about this country, it's so lovely and beautiful and full of lovely statues. The only thing I would every change about this country is the pigeons. Its insane, birds in America just know that their place is in the trees or in the sky(occasionally on the roof tops). Birds here don't understand this simple process of staying where your wings allow you to stay. They walk right up to you and fly all around your face and just all in all get in the way like a butt.

Whatevs, enough about those savages with wings. Although I wouldn't choose to live in this very expensive country, I do adore it. I hope that I can come back one day. Still got about a month of awesomeness before I hop back across the pond to the land of huge portion sizes(I already know what I'm gonna order from taco bell). Next, I go see Stone Henge. Hopefully sometime this week or the next. Also, more trips to London, there are two museums that I want to see. I'm hungry, I want some cookies. These oatmeal raisin cookies are no joke.

 

  

Where I'm From

Growing up I had times of instability. Times when I was uncertain of where food would come from. There were times when we would have our electricity turned off and would have no heat during winter. There were times when we would have only cold water and would have to heat it on the gas stove to take baths. We laugh about it now but the sight of me and my sister cooking marshmallows over a candle in the dark was a very real thing in my childhood. 

In the end, like now in life, we were always so very well taken care of. God would step in in one way or another. People who we had never met before would bring us food. Strangers would give us money that would be exactly what we needed. Loved ones would come in at the right time and take care of us with love and grace. 

Somehow its easy to forget these moments of love and the times when God steps in and takes care of us. Because of my childhood, the fear of instability is crippling for me. Not having a safety net of finances scares me and brings on anxiety which brings on depression which leaves me lacking faith and cursing at God. In the end, He always takes care of me. Very real answers to financial prayers got answered these last few days and I know more trials are to come. These trials might be rough and I might slip in to one of my freak outs but I know that I will be taken care of. 

I've been given such an amazing opportunity to be here in England. The possibility of coming back and going to school here has appeared. I've met so many amazing people and I've seen so many things that I've only ever dreamed of seeing. Tried some amazing Indian food and had the pleasure of trying crumpets with tea. 

Life is amazing and I forget that so easily. I try to remember but with depression its hard to see the end of the storm when you're in it. Luckily I have so many people who love me and who take me aside and remind me of how amazing and wonderful life is. Thank you, everyone in my heart. Thank you for loving me and lifting me up and listening to me whine and all that goodness. 

This picture and the one in the previous entry were taken in the same day, within hours of each other.

The Great Britain Depression; Ralph and Lauren

So. I've been busy. Again. This is Ralph. I really don't like Ralph. Ralph is a Nightingale, I think, maybe. Ralph is really persistent about getting food from you even if you're still eating it.

This is Lauren. I don't like Lauren either. Lauren has one good leg and is very terrifying when he starts flying with his gang of pigeon friends. The pigeons in this country have no fear. Nor do they actually fly away when you're walking by them. Only when you are sitting do they decide to fly all around you. And for those of us, me, who have irrational fears of flying creatures who fly close to your face; this can be a terrifying and uncomfortable thing. Which leads me to screaming and hiding behind my slightly amused and confused friends. 

On another note, why don't the imbalanced enzymes in my brain know that I'm on vacation? I obviously got on a plane and left all my troubles behind physically. Why do they not balance out cause its vacation time?! Its frustrating, not being able to leave my mental illnesses behind and just wholeheartedly enjoy my trip. Not that I'm unhappy to be here. I'm so excited to be in this country. I love being here with my friends and when I'm up and about I'm laughing and smiling. 

Then come the days where I lay in bed till 1:30 pm and I feel horrible about it. I hate putting my friends through this. They shouldn't have to deal with my emotional swings. They shouldn't have to be put in that position. I can't stand that there are days when I just want to sit and watch tv(on my laptop) all day and not move. Makes me feel like I'm wasting this wonderful trip but nothing in my body wants to move at all. I feel guilty and emotional so often and I keep forgetting to take my meds. In the front of my mind I keep thinking "anybody else could do this trip better than you". I don't know. Just another down day. 

Feels like I'm letting everybody down. It sucks. 

Been Busy II

So, day two trip to London. Again, not near the sight seeing places but it is still in London. Last time was West London, this time was Northwest London where Jonathan's brother resides. We were celebrating Jonathan's sister's birthday. This was a special situation where I was able to meet all of Jonathan and Jodi's England family. 

Over supper, cake, and fizzy drink we laughed and talked about many things. Its surprising how many people remember my sister from Jodi and Jonathan's wedding and they all think that I'm her. So it turns out that this beautiful vision of a lady who is married to Jonathan's brother does hair. She, after my gentle prodding, happily agreed to do my hair that very night and then do a total make up make over. Twas quite the experience. 
 
I loved seeing the family all together. Their dynamic was so familiar to how I react with my own family. I also love seeing a group of guys communicating together and I got to see that in a wonderful way. I feel so honored to have met Jonathan's father. He looks so different than what I had expected. Such a jolly soul with a bright smile and yet a commanding presence. 

As someone who has constantly been mistaken as Jonathan's sister, it was nice to see both his sisters in one place. They are so different in so many ways and alike in so many other ways, very much like my own brother in comparison to my sister and I. Their other brother reminded me so much of my dear sister. Quick and ready to laugh, sarcastic and light hearted. It was only in that moment, being surrounded by Jodi and Jonathan's family, that I became a little homesick.  


Then I found a cat friend that I named Sir Tuffington. Still trying to find out how to take him home with me. 

Also...I committed an abomination...and I liked it. Beloved, I have put peanut butter and nutella on bread. I ate it. I saw that it was good. I am ashamed.

Been Busy I

A Beautiful building in Oxford

So, lots has been going on. Lets see, we had Jodi's birthday party. Cake and all that goodness. Found out the difference between a cupcake and a fairy cake. Traveled off into the land of Oxford and found out that there isn't exactly a campus but a long line of buildings that stretch all over the town. Beautiful old buildings of wonder and history. 

Then there was the trip into London. ADRA had a concert to raise money for their many activities. Some of which I'm very interested in. Many talented singers were there, the drums could be felt right in your chest which people keep telling me is normal. Further testing is needed... The part of London that we went to was mostly Arabic and so busy with wonderful sounds and smells. 

I saw a blue phone box and it was not indeed a tardis but I have not given up hope. Mostly all I've seen is red phone boxes. The search goes on. 

After the glorious trip to London, a night to remember indeed, we went out to the allotment and began playing in the dirt. This is what it must have looked like anyway. In all honesty we got a lot done for the three of us and two kids rummaging around not knowing exactly what we were doing. In the end, three older gentlemen came out and talked very kindly to us about our options and how we could tackle this gardening space with the least amount of hassle. 

One of these gentlemen were nice enough to give us a crap ton of plums and baking apples! Promises of plum apple crumbles have been made repeatedly, none have come into being. But, being the amazing people that Jodi and Jonathan are, they did make jam from the plums and it is very tasty. It taste like peach jam though. Still super good. 

Next I shall talk about the second trip to London.

My Party People

Sometimes its hard to believe I'm here. I find myself telling Jodi and Jonathon 'I'm here in England' or 'I came to see you!' and they just laugh and say yes you did. Being here with them and the girls is amazing. Planning my trip to London, getting to know the people they introduce me to, listening to these amazing girls talk about everything and anything that is of utmost importance. I feel so blessed to be here. 

Upon the arrival of my host back to their home we went out and ate at Nandos. Shame on me, I didn't get the chicken. We'll have to go again before I leave. Twas a lovely place and we had a blast. The girls kept trying to escape and that was hilarious to watch. After we ate, we

walked around town and like a tourist I took pictures of everything...like...everything. Statues, pipes with cloves growing on them, more statues, the girls running about, and more statues. 

Next day we went out and ventured to the park, the girls, Jodi, and I. This was quite the event. I realized that child socializing is a stressful thing for me. I become very concerned with their social experiences and how they will scar them for life. The girls had a blast though, they eventually(after careful consideration) found friends and played with them. It even got to the point where there was a bit of screaming about lack of fairness when one of the new friends had to leave. 

This brought us to the swings where I stood by while Jodi pushed tiny princess on the swing. There was another mother pushing her darling baby on the swing. This neighboring mother was noticing bigger princess being a bit shy trying to find new friends. We got to talking, the three of us adults, and then the question was asked. 
" So...how did you two...I mean...how did you guys get two mixed babies between the two of you" Said the interested neighboring momma
" Huh?" Said Jodi and I in confusion
" I mean, how did you guys have two mixed raced babies together?" She asked again, looking a little less sure in her questioning
" They're not mine." I said laughing
" They're mine." Jodi says with a laugh
" Oh! I just thought, you(pointing at me) were so invested in them. Oh goodness. Can we just forget I ever asked that?(not on your life)" 

We all had a good laugh about that. Probably a story I'll tell for the rest of my life. So far I've flashed half of Aylesbury my bum, been confused for a lesbian, and have had tea and pudding which had nothing to do with actual tea and actual pudding! This has been amazing. 

It has been asked how this whole adventure began, why did I come to England. Well, its simple, I missed my peeps. They moved to England so I saved up and it was either buy a ticket to England or buy a car. I got the ticket, told my job I'd be gone for three months, got on the plane and here I am! No man, no kids, no responsibilities. Off I went and I'm so glad I did. 

Today found me in a pub for the first time in my life. It was pretty awesome, the bar tender ladies were nice. They talked slowly to me after they found out that I was from America. First time that has happened. Usually they just laugh at me and then ask me how I'm liking England. Didn't end up getting a drink but I got some fish and chips which Jodi and Jonathan said was sub par in comparison to where I could get real fish and chips. Which I find funny since they're both vegetarian. 
 
Went to the library and inquired about books on the last Russian empire, the Romanov family. The librarian was very confused about that. A walk around downtown brought us to a little mall where these two walking advertisements were holding hawk like birds and directing people to the Aylesbury exhibit with dress up! The market street was covered in little tents with nick knacks and clothes and fresh fruits and vegetables. There was also a random guy selling Native American stuff in a not so authentic Native American garb and pretending to play a flute.

Very random day. I loved it. I'm gonna call it Freddy.

Happy Sabbath Adventure!

Be warned my sweet atheist friends of wonder, this post has lots of loving on my Lord and savior Jesus Christ. Skip it if you want.

So we went to church today and that was actually really nice. I haven't been to church in a long time, kinda been avoiding the whole scene since my last church went for the long sleep and everyone I went to church with kinda moved away. I think its easier to go to church when you're just visiting cause you know its not a commitment. Hopefully this will start me back in the habit of getting myself to church on sabbath. 

After church, the lovely family that gave me a lift took me to their place and we had "tea" cause it wasn't quite lunch time and it wasn't quite dinner time. Sadly there wasn't exactly any tea involved. Just...the word "tea". It did however involve a lovely meal and "pudding" which isn't exactly pudding. It was however a great cake like thing with jam and some kind of custard in the middle. It was really good. 

Turns out I'm an answer to prayer. This lovely couple were looking for someone to baby sit their amazingly funny son and here I am with a long history of working with children. It all works out wonderfully. I of course said yes, it would really be an answer to my prayers as well! So its possible that I could have a little working gig thing while I'm here which would be nice for a few more pounds(currency, not weight....I don't need more weight). Another plus, out their kitchen window is a gate that I'm in love with and I could stare at it all day if I baby sat for them. 

Their child, who is so funny and quick with a come back has this painting that he did. Story is that there was a penguin in the background, but the child has named the painting "the penguin is gone" since you can no longer see the penguin. I personally believe its genius and I agree with the mom that its gonna be worth millions when this kid is a professional painter.

Back to the adventure, we drove all over town and saw lots of houses that looked like little story book houses, a taxi cab that had the funniest name, and more of the strange driving habits of the citizens of Aylesbury

Anyhoo, it was a great day and I really felt that God touched the hearts of everyone at that church today. There was a wonderful speaker there today and she gave a great message about seeing God again soon. I'm so grateful to be here and I'm loving every minute of it. I thank God for being here today and all the opportunities that come with it. I'm so excited to see what happens tomorrow. 





Also, this soap is the truth. I need it in America. Like, yesterday. 

It has an amazing spicy smell and it sticks with you for hours after you use it. I usually only smell soap on me for a little bit but then I dry off. I smell this for so long. I love it. Also, it has a crown on it. 

They aren't paying me to post this soap...but they should...cause I love it.